In order to reshape our world, we must first begin with ourselves. Become the woman you think should represent white women everywhere. Work on your posture, your smile, and your social skills. Take a critical look at yourself. If you were your husband, would you be proud to walk around with you on your arm? Do you need to lose some weight? Do you wear too much or too little makeup? Are your clothes unflattering or unfeminine? Make a note of improvements you’d like to make, and list small manageable, steps you can do to head in the right direction. 

Our improvement doesn’t only rely on our appearance, though. Everything you do influences the rest of our race. Don’t believe me? Think of a woman in a run-down trailer house. What do you think of? Maybe a single mom, on drugs, with unwashed kids? What standards would a man who married her have? Would he care if he looked presentable? Would he keep his tools and car parts from sprawling across the yard? What kind of expectations would parents like that have of their kids? Now, contrast this image with the one of a middle class housewife. Clean, personable, sociable? What is her marital situation? What does her husband look like? Their yard? Their kids? You may think it begins with the pocketbook, the house, or the neighborhood, but it truly begins with you.

With this in mind, consider other aspects of your life. How is your health? The nutrition you provide for your family? How healthy are your children and husband? Don’t start nagging them if they eat junk foods and lay on the couch all day. It is your responsibility to prevent these bad habits. Start making small changes for them. Do you smoke? What is your alcohol consumption? What is your activity level? How is your mood? Do you find yourself complaining or nagging? Do you run your family members down if they fail at a task you set them to? Be honest here, you don’t have to admit it to anyone but yourself. Most of us have to keep a tight rein on our mouths, otherwise our emotions and stress come bubbling out and fill our homes. Your stress is no one else’s responsibility. Even if you feel your husband doesn’t give you enough help, keep your mouth shut. We’ll work on that later, and even that begins with you. 

How engaged are you with your children? Do you know what they’re learning in school? Who their friends are? What their favorite activities are? How are their grades? Do you hound them about doing better in school or sports? Stop. Keep your mouth shut in the improvement of your kids, too. I know, they are your responsibility, but reminding them of their shortcomings is not going to help anyone, and sticks them within a frame they have difficulty imagining themselves escaping. Stop using phrases like “you need to” or “you have to”. Your voice becomes their voice. Speak to them how you want them to speak to themselves. 

Go through every part of your life you can think of, and ask yourself, “if every white woman did this, would it help us or hurt us?” I’ll go through several of the most common issues in future posts. Our ancestors didn’t face the trials of history for us to be undisciplined and frazzled. Let’s be our own change.